Teach Your Children Well

Originally written on my other blog, Wednesday, October 19, 2005.

Powerful words. Words that I have been thinking a lot about these past few weeks.

My friends have told me that I am being to hard on myself. That I should just accept myself as I am. That no, I am not that low maintenance personality - calm, patient, maternal.

I would like to take their advice but I can't. I don't think it's fair to my children. I already see the same traits in my daughter as I had when I was her age. I swore to myself that when I had children they would not inherit the same legacy as I did from my mother and her mother and her grandmother. All strong, opinionated women with high expectations, a need to always be in control, and full of insecurities. I lack patience and I am quick with the temper with those I love the most. I never moved passed the id stage in life. No, that's not completely true. I am an affectionate and compassionate person. I am always drawn to the underdog, the sufferer of injustice. I was once asked why that is so. What did I hope to accomplish or was I even aware of it? It really caught me off guard but it was also very thought provoking.

I swore to myself that my children would not be like me, my sister, my nieces, my aunts. I come from a family who yells too much. A friend of mine told me that is a prerequisite of being a Jewish mother, that and the guilt. I do feel guilty, because despite my attempts to prevent this from being passed down to the next generation, I have failed. I love my children, but many times, I don't like being a mother. A favorite aunt would be better. I could spoil them, give them lots of attention with plenty of patience, coddle and dote on them and always have nice things to say to them. That would be ideal. But that's a rescue fantasy.

My daughter is a mini-me. Truth be known, it's rather scary how much we have in common. Yes, much of it is environmental (my taste in music, for instance), but a lot of it is just innate. I don't want her going doing down the same path as I did. At times it was very painful and lonely. Times have changed. Catch phrases have changed too. When I was young, noone knew about ADHD or Sensory Integration disabilities. My husband swears that I have ADD. I don't see it, but I do believe I probably had the later... Sensory Integration.

At 35, my husband realized he had ADD. He would sit in meetings at his school, with parents, educators, counselors and discuss a particular child's behavior. Whenever it was brought up that the child most likely had ADHD because of a list of symptoms and behavioral patterns, something always clicked with him. The way the child was described...lazy, very smart but not focused, can't sit still, starts a project but never finishes and so on. That was him to the T.

And that's our daughter too, but she is an experimental learner and that scares the hell out of us. She too, is smart, strong willed , impulsive, and bossy. Despite the consequences, she would rather get her way than relinquish any control. She loves the dance, the drama. She's my drama queen. But she is also very affectionate, compassionate, a nurturer when it really counts, and a seeker of justice.

Just like me.

Dig for a Day in Beit Guvrin

As mentioned below this is an archeological site from the Hasmonean Dynasty. The first cave we were in was to dig for anything that could be catalogued and help tell a story, it included pottery, animal bones (from food they would have disposed of), animal carvings, coins, etc. We divided our dig into two categories - buckets with piles of dirt and rocks and buckets full of our discoveries. Noah and Gili kept finding over and over all the good stuff, including part of a jaw with the teeth still attached (EWW!). I just kept finding rocks. Natalie also found some great stuff, as well as David and Ariel. When leaving the cave we were asked to bring up all of our buckets of rocks and dirt so we could sift through them. That's when I found, what I hope is authentic (and not dirt or a weird shape rock) an animal carving. Who knows, the next time you are in a museum and see a display of animal carvings from this period - it might be what I discovered. : )

After we left that cave, we then explored an untouch cave. That took some getting use too, but it was really awesome. As you can see above, the folks who lived in this cave raised pigeons. That's what all those holes in the walls are - cool huh? There were some very tight spaces, including one that reminded me of what a birthing canal might be like. We all got very dirty and had to crawl around alot in the semi-darkness, but it was very cool and a whole lot of fun. The kids all agreed that this was on the top of their list of favorites. Can't wait to return and do it all again.

Btw, that adorable picture of the couple there is our cousins Sarah and Menechem, with whom we owe a tremendous amount thanks for allowing us to stay with them, in their beautiful apartment in Jerusalem.

A Noahism

Whenever one of our children would make a comment or ask a question that was just too fantastic to not pass on or to write down, we would call them a Natalism or Noahism.

Today, it was Noah's turn.

We were walking back to our car this morning and he heard someone beeping a car horn. He asked me, "Momma, why are they beeping their horn." I told him that I didn't know and figured that was the end of it. In all seriousness he then said to me, "hmm, maybe they are Israelie." OMG, I just about died with laughter.

As you know we just returned from a three week trip to Israel. This was a first for my husband and children and it's been 20 years since I was last there. All three of them definitely picked up on many of the Israelie customs, gestures and behaviors that are so common there. My husband and I always love to see the world through our children's eyes and ears. Oh, how I really wished that I could have called and shared it with my husband (who is England ) for he would also have been rolling on the floor laughing because it is sooo true!

So Tired

I am writing this from home. The kids and I arrived late last night (David is spending 2 weeks more in England) and if it wasn't for the long flight, I would hop on a plane and return back to Israel.

We had such a great time and it's so awesome to see all the advancements and prosperity that Israel and Israelies have gained since I last visited there 20 years ago. I know it seems funny to think that a country would just remain frozen in time but I really was surprised by how much it has changed. It also might be that I am no longer a teenager living there, so my experiences and how I see the world is much different now than then.

We were really lucky to find a family to swap cars with us, so we had a minivan to use and we had wonderful people to stay with. We didn't get to see everything that we wanted (such as some great museums up North and Tel Aviv, as well as Masada, the Western Wall tunnel tours, and some other archeology sites) but what we did do was often off the beaten path and so much fun.

The kids especially love the "Dig for a Day" in which we (our family and the Bogners) spent time digging in an underground cave for remnants from the Hasmonean dynasty time period (I found an animal carving which was really cool), then we climb down and through some caves that have not been excavated, and then it was topped off by visiting a fully excavated site which had been a major place for olive pressing.

Other places that we visited which the kids also enjoyed was the Latrun Tank Museum, Jerusalem's Old City Ramparts (you are walking on top of the outer walls that surround the Old City) and the The Bullet Factory whose code name was the Ayalon Insitute, a military factory during the British Mandate, that disguised itself by operating as a Kibbutz near the town of Rechovot. Only a small group of pioneers were involved with the covert operation - everyone else who lived and work on the Kibbutz (called Giraffes) thought it was a legitimate commune. David had already left the country when we visited the most spectacular Stalactite Avshalom Cave , in Bet Shemesh as well as one of the most beautiful beaches that I've have ever visited (excluding Hawaii) - Nitzanim Beach, located on the Ashdod Dunes Preserves.

I truly can't wait to return with the family to our home away from home.

Here are few pictures ...

David showing off his backgammon skills with our new Druze friends


Vogue, Vogue, Vogue in Bet Shean




Noah and I, Nachal Snir, Golan Heights David and the kids, Netanya

Warren Shaft on our way down to Hezekiah's Tunnel in the City of David



Our Ein Gedi/Dead Sea excusion

Rosh HaNikra Grottos

Netanya, Ch. 3

We arrived at 4am.

We figured that since we were planning to be in Netanya to visit my father's gravesite, and I remembered that Netanya had some really upscale hotels we would just try that before we just camp out in our car. Well, Netanya has changed (it's quite rundown and all developed near the beach) and we found only one upscale hotel which was booked. The other hotels in the area did have rooms, and at least their clerks were honest, for when I asked if they had problems with Roaches, they said, This is Israel, and so yes, they can't guarantee there aren't any. They come through the windows, the waterpipes, etc. (and btw, all the hotels lobbies were unbearably hot, they do not use the a/c.) so David and I made the decision to just sleep in the van. We found a nice spot near a park off the beach and made the best of it.

A few hours later we all were up, had breakfast from our cooler, and headed for the beach for a short visit for the kids. Of course they loved the beach (which of course changed greatly - does not look anything like it did when I lived there) and were excited to see all the jellyfish that had washed ashore (I think the Israelis call them Medusa?) After the beach and a stroll along a very nice promenade, we were ready to go to my father's gravesite.

A few months ago, I posted on the Netanya Yahoo list serv an inquiry to asking how I could locate my father's cemetery and gravestone. I got so many responses back, but one person actually wrote me that he not only called and got the information for me, he went to the cemetery, found the location and took pictures. He wrote to me all the information and even offered to clean the marble. I was beyond words with his generosity and a little suspicious especially for the offer, so I passed on that. He told me that when we get to Netanya to call him and he would help us find the cemetery.

So I did. He literally dropped everything he was doing, grabbed a taxi and met us at the Bus Station (where Natalie, who was waiting with me, got a taste of some of the Israeli culture - competing taxi drivers yelling at each other, and passengers getting on a bus - ok not getting, but pushing, shoving, crowding in, to board the bus (that's another thing about this country - they have no clue what a line is - whether it's standing in a line, or parking a car - nada, but I digress.) He was this young guy in his 30's (I expected him to be an older man) who made aliyah with his family about 15 years. He was very nice, expected nothing in return, and was just so thrilled with himself for doing such a great mitzvah for us. He told us that he told his Rabbi about what he had done, and even when we were at the cemetery, he called his Rabbi again.

He said he used to be frum before he got married, but his wife wasn't and he is very bitter that he can't be because of it (he told us how unhappy he was in his marriage, etc.) He also said that it was his fate to help us, because when he originally went to the cemetery, he couldn't find the headstone. He then asked G-d to help him find it, and viola, the number just appeared in his head and was standing in front of the stone.

Uh huh, I know what you are thinking, and yes, he was a little off, but still very sweet. He even kept the the vultures away from us - vultures meaning the religious men who hound you in the parking lot about saying a prayer in exchange for money, and the employees of the cemetery who drive around and are persistent with their requests to clean the marble. They came up to us as we were looking for the stone and insisted on showing us the gravesite. Then he just kept asking us if we wanted them to clean it. When we said no, he just kept haggling the price, until, David yelled at them to have some respect and to leave us alone. It was just unreal. Flashbacks of the day we buried my father came rushing back. It was very disgraceful, the people who are responsible for the whole process of the burial and caretaking.

Actually early in the morning, I was sitting in the park before anyone got up, reminiscing about my father and our life in Netanya and even our visits to Haifa. I rarely talk about the last few months that my father was alive and all the guilt I have felt for leaving him behind, when he was still so sick and frail.

He had travelled to the States over the summer prior to his passing where he had visited the VA hospital and had a full checkup. It took several months before the mail caught up with us when it said in the letter that there was something wrong, like internal bleeding or something similar and he needed to get medical attn for it. It came too late. A few weeks after he returned from the States, he was in the Hospital (a very bad one at that.)

We thought he had a heart attack but it was pulmonary edema. He was in the hospital for several weeks and I hated him in there, as well as him. I wanted to try to move him to Jerusalem or to a hospital in Tel Aviv, but the insurance wouldn't cover it and we didn't have any money to do it privately. He wouldn't eat the food, his already thin self, was just barely skin and bones, and the nurses didn't speak English. AIDS was very well known then, so I was so shocked by the appearance of used blood soaked cotton balls and gauze on the floor. The nurses used their teeth to cut the (tubes?) they used to tie around the arm to take blood. Also in the waiting room there was a table with some coffee. Next to it was a pitcher of milk (back then milk only came in a plastic bag which sat in a pitcher.) I noticed that there was lipstick on the opening of the milk bag. I asked the nurse how she opened the bag and she gestured with her teeth. I was so disgusted and so shocked. This was a hospital. How barbaric.

I felt awful because I also was living and working temporarily in Jerusalem, and I was dating someone that I really care for, and wanted to only spend time with him because I was planning to leave Israel soon and to finally backpack through Europe. When my dad did get home, he stopped smoking cold turkey - a 2 pack a day, 50 year old habit, he also was still quite ill and weak and his normal, very calm, gentle, personality was replaced by someone very cranky and in need of a lot of help. All I wanted was to leave the country. I had desperately wanted to visit Europe and I was so tired of living in Israel by then, I just acted very selfishly towards my father and his needs.

When I got my ticket to leave (couldn't go to Europe because I had to quit my job in Jerusalem and move back to Netanya) my father didn't want me to leave. He wanted me to stay in Israel with him. My neighbor, who so kindly looked after my father also thought I should stay until my brother arrived, which was going to be in another few weeks, and my brother also told me not to go. That Dad needed me there until he got there, and of course my boyfriend didn't want me to leave either. But, I didn't care - I was feeling suffocated and just wanted to escape and get back to the States as soon as possible.

Before I left, I stocked up the refrigerator and freezer and knew that my neighbor would take of him until my brother arrived. Less than a week after my departure - he died. He had another attack and couldn't reach for his medicine in time. My neighbor hadn't seen him and when she went to check on him, erev Yom Kippur, she discovered he has passed away, alone in his bed, with his medicine bottle knocked on the floor. My brother was very angry at me and I know he blamed me for what had happen.

I have never talked about this with my brother or my sister. After 22 years, I still find it very difficult to talk about it. In fact, I almost skipped going back to Netanya and the cemetery. I don't think of my dad in that way. Just because his body is buried there, his soul is always near me, no matter where I live. But in the end, I am glad I did go, if not for me, for my kids.

We ended our journey by going to Herzilya Petuach and grabbing some lunch in the Marina, then headed back to Jerusalem, to our cousins clean and wonderful flat.

The last two days were most definitely an adventure, but that's what great stories are made of ....

The Ambassadors, Ch. 2

So to pick up from where I left off, we cancelled our room at the Har Carmel and decided to just try the Holiday Inn. It's what we originally wanted hours earlier, but we never could find it. We kept going in circles, but this time we finally figured it out (actually near the gardens and I finally recognized some of the area - woohoo).

Of course they were full too but the desk clerk was very nice and tried to find us accomodations in Caesaria and Netanya but nothing was available. The security guy sitting outside was also very nice and we asked if it was possible to leave our van in front of the lobby while we went to get some food and he said no problem. We walked up to the Carmel Center and had a delicious vegetarian meal at Greg's. It was so yummy. Sorta made up for the whole evening. When we walked back to the hotel, I ask the clerk again (a different person) if anyone cancelled, he said no, but he called the La Meridian, located way below on the beach.

There were rooms available and for a decent rate. We got lost again and kept circling down and up and one way streets until we finally got to the bottom of the hill near the beach. To get to the beach, you take a side road that passes under a narrow bridge and then to another side road adjacent to the beach. As we headed towards the hotel, there were a number of parked cars, in semi darkness. It reminded me of when I lived in Israel before and went to this out away restaurant/pub in Tel Aviv, with my boyfriend and his friends. Near there was a deserted strip along the beach and it was full of male prostitutes. So I wondered if these were prostitutes. David didn't think so, but by the way they were dress there was no denying it. Hmm, where the heck are we, it looked like a nice area.

Anyway, we arrive at the hotel and again, it was located next to this huge building that looked like a new corporate building. It was almost pitched black. The hotel also look really nice from the inside, so we were finally relieved and optimistic. When I walked inside, the air was off and it was so humid and hot and it was full of teenagers running around. The front desk counter looked worned and unprofessional, but I was still hopeful, afterall, this was suppose to be a 5 star hotel. There was only a few people on staff - a desk clerk, a person who I guess fixes up the rooms, a bartender, and a security guard. By now it was way after midnight. I stood there for over 40 minutes trying to get my room. This poor kid had the phones ringing (with English speakers and none of the other men knew English very well except for the clerk), the teenagers, who were drunk, needing attn, the bartender who needed to know the exchange rate so he could take dollars instead of shekels, and so on. It was so entertaining to watch. I really felt bad for this kid - it was like watching a comedy of errors.

Originally he was going to give me two rooms - one with a bed and the other with a pullout sofa. But I didn't want to pay an additional 100 shekels for that, so he said he would move a couch in the room. The guy he asked said they don't have anything like that, so the clerk just gave the same room for the lower price. But when they tried to find the keys (still have keys not cards and they were scattered around in different drawers) they couldn't find them, so he found us another room, even better - a suite with a kitchen. Great, wonderful, but the only rooms left were in the next building.

The bldg next door that looked like a corporate headquarters that had been abandoned. He said to drive in the underground parking and take the elevator up, so we did. However, once we got to the garage, it spanned the length of several blocks - all the buildings above and elevator entrances were not marked, so we had no idea where to go. Now remember it's now getting closer to 2:00 am or later and we are exhausted. We had all our bags and a cooler and had to wake the kids and get them upstairs. I go up to check if this is the right building. I go to the floor the room is on and when the elevator door opens up, it completely dark. It was like I was in the Shining - it was so eerie. So I finally found the lobby (after getting turn around on different floors - all very hot and looking like they desperately needed a facelift - but not as bad as the previous two hotels.) The clerk looked surprised and I told him our situation, so he went with us to help escort us to our rooms.

So we here are in the this underground parking garage, which is almost empty and he points to the right elevators, so he thought - nope wrong, so we drove around some more and he found the right ones. He kept apologizing and helped up with our bags and took us to our room. We go up to the floor and it's the wrong side of this gigantic building. We take the elevator down, walked to the other side, take it up and walk to our room, down a corridor that definitely is not a 5 star hotel quality. Wouldn't you know it that the key he gave us was the wrong key. So we drag ourselves back down to the lobby and wait for him to get us a key to another room. All I kept thinking was, they are going to comp us this room. It's been almost 2 hours since we tried to check in. Meanwhile there is no air conditioning at all in the building. I guess they only allow the guests to use it in their rooms. It was very hot and humid.

Almost 2 hrs later, the children barely able to stand or sit without falling over, waiting in this lobby with a security guard who is very bored but wait it gets better, who should happen to come into this building's lobby and walk over to a phone to call a taxi, but three of the hookers. They obviously did this alot, since the guard never said a word and they knew exactly where to go. I looked at David and we just couldn't believe this. Natalie looked at them and when they left, said "Momma, those girls were sure dressed funny. They look so weird."

Finally another guy (the other hotel's guard) came with a key and took our things up to the room. We walked in and at first it actually looked quite nice. It was a three room suite with a kitchen. The beds looked clean, however they didn't have fitted mattress sheets and when I lifted up the bedspread, the bottom sheet came up to revealing that if we slept there, we would probably end up rolling around on the mattress itself. But, ok, not such a big deal. Then suddenly my eye caught this thing on the carpet. I looked closer because it blended in with the pattern on the carpet but then suddenly it started to move. It was this big, light brown roach. It scurried away behind the closet and I yelled at David that there is roach in the bedroom. He didn't believe me and then he took a look and just stood there, looking so sad that we had to leave. As we walked back to the living room, Natalie started to shout because another roach ran under the chair Noah was sitting on, and then I jumped and yelled as another roach nearly ran over my toes. We hauled ass out of there and hit the road for Netanya. It is now after 3am in the morning.

To be continued ...

Wandering Jews, Ch. 1

Hmm, where even to begin this story of our adventures yesterday. With David finally feeling a little bit better, we finally felt comfortable leaving our wonderful nest for some sightseeing along the Northern coast and then to our next couchsurfing experience. This time, it was with an older couple who according to their profile seemed very cool and who enjoyed hosting and sightseeing with their guests. We were originally supposed to show up on Sunday and stay for two nights, but because of David's illness we postponed for only Monday night, or so we thought.

We finally got on the road around late morning towards our first destination, Rosh HaNikra. The ride across the Galil was just beautiful, with many areas reminding us of our trip to the Gold country in California. The kids and David were very excited to be a stone's throw from the Lebanonese border. The grottoes were gorgeous, and the kids loved not only exploring the exciting caves and tunnels, but the interactive movie explaining the history. I had visited the grottoes before and I don't think I ever learned about the history of them. It's really quite fascinating.

Another fascinating museum that I really wanted to visit but we got there just minutes too late, was the Ghetto Fighters museum: a museum dedicated to those who fought in the resistance during the Holocaust. It's a very impressive building and it just so happens to be built near a Roman aqueduct that spans from around Haifa down towards Caesaria. It was about this time that we called our hosts to let them know our timeline. Well, it seems that they had made other plans and because we never made it the night before, they went away for a few days, leaving us stranded. When David mentioned that we didn't have a place to stay (and they knew we had the children with us), they just said, maybe next time and that they weren't even home, they already left . Well their plans didn't include letting us know, nor did they even make any suggestions or try to help us find accommodations, especially so late in the day.

Though David was feeling anxious about us not having any place to stay, I felt more optimistic and assured him we would find something, at least in Haifa. Well that was my first mistake and boy did we pay for it, but I will get to that a little bit later.

So because what I had planned was not going to work for the day, I was trying to think of ways we could still manage to see most of what I had planned. One our major concerns was that ALL of our belongings were in the back seat of our minivan and that made me nervous, especially when we pulled into Akko. The old city looked very casbah-ish which is intriguing, but we didn't feel comfortable with our car so exposed. We tried a few places to park the car, but each time we got out, something was pulling us back to change locations, until we decided that both of us were getting weird vibes and maybe Akko would be better to tour under difference circumstances. So next on our agenda was Haifa. Now, the last time I was in Haifa was probably 22 or 23 years ago and again, with all the new highways and residential, corporate and industrial buildings, I have been finding it so hard to re-orient myself to my new surroundings. I look for certain landmarks and either they aren't there anymore, or the highway is no longer in view of them. Anyway, as we got closer to Haifa, I realized that I had never seen the North side and never knew how industrial the area is with refineries, chemical plants, etc. My goal was to get us to the top. I remembered that is where the Baha'i Gardens were and so we snaked our way upwards through some very tight streets (there are WAY TOO MANY cars in Israel and the cities and older communities are not planned out for them so it's very tight with people parking on the sidewalk, sideways, backwards, this way and that - if they only enforce their parking the country would be RICH!!!) however we never saw any signs for the gardens, or the subway or anything else that I remembered and I never remembered the views facing a port and a large industrial area. Also everything was in Russian or Ethiopian (Israel's two most recent immigrant populations i.e., within the last 20 yrs, and a very large one that) and the neighborhoods in general looked quite run down) so we started to ask around and were told that we were on the wrong hilltop, we needed to go the other side of the Haifa.

Wow - Haifa is really big and spread out. All this time, I only thought it was this tiny city on Mt. Carmel. We finally managed to work our way over to the other hilltops and now it was time to find a tourist center or a hotel. Each time we asked someone, they made a ew-wha sound and told us we were really far from where should needed to be. David was getting nervous, Natalie really had to find a bathroom, and I was still confident that as long as we are near one of the Universities, there had to be some hotels. Around and around and around we went going up and down the hills, until we finally saw an indoor mall. Natalie and I jumped out to find a bathroom for her and everyone kept pointing towards the inside. Finally, one restaurant had a restroom and as we were walking away, I noticed a woman sitting alone at table. I swear I knew her, so I whispered to Natalie that let's pretend we are looking out the window and to walk back near her so I could get a second look. OMG, it was a woman that belong to our shul, who now was studying Torah in Jerusalem for three years and was in Haifa to do a three month intense Hebrew-language class. I told her our situation, but she apologized that this was only her second day in Haifa and she was living in the dorms and knew nothing about the area . Natalie then noticed out the window, that David and Noah were heading towards the mall but they didn't know where we were, so we started to race around the mall, trying to head them off so we all wouldn't get lost. Whew, we found them, and I showed him our surprise.

After we said our goodbyes, I learned that just down the street are many hotels, so we leisurely went grocery shopping and then started towards all the hotels, many of them 5*s. We didn't care at that moment. We just wanted to settle in, then go out and enjoy the Carmel center. EVERY hotel we called or drove by was completely booked. We did managed to find one on the list who did have a few rooms. My gut told me that this was going to turn out bad, but what choice did we have. It was already 8pm, the kids hadn't eaten yet, we were tired, and David was still under the weather. They wanted $145 for the room - one bed (really a thin mattress on a box) and two cots for the kids. As I walked in the lobby, I felt uncomfortable -it was old, stained carpets, banged up, etc, but I wasn't going to pass any judgement until I saw the room. What a dump. I told the guy no thank you and he didn't even bat an eyelash, he just took the key and we left. So we kept trying to find the Holiday Inn by driving around in circles. The traffic was so bad, even on a Monday evening and the side streets very tight to drive down. In our quest to find the hotel, we stopped and asked a taxi driver for help. He asked if we tried all the hotels including the Har Carmel. He promised us that this hotel was nothing like the previous one and he even called them to find out if they had any rooms. He then got back into the taxi and had us follow him. The hotel looked very nice on the outside and we were relieved that we had such good fortune. We wanted to tip him, but he refused. We went inside and even though the room was expensive ($215) I was hopeful. The lobby looked well worn and the front desk also seemed worn, but it was a room. He told us that the rate was so high because of the extra beds for the kids and that it was in their other building across the parking lot. He wanted to be paid in full up front, so we did and began our journey. Journey is a great word here because it's now way late and as we stood in the parking lot, we had no clue which apt bldg he was referring to. David finally figured it out and went upstairs to check the room. When he came back down, I asked how it was and he seemed a little hesitant. "They just finished making the children's beds and the sheets all look clean." "What about our room?" I asked. "It's acceptable." "Acceptable? What does that mean? - This is costing us over $200 and it's only acceptable?" "Well, your standards are different than mine and there are some things about it that you may not feel comfortable about."

So we headed towards it. Again, as I was walking towards the lobby, little details started to pop out which gave away it's true character. This place, I just knew was going to be a dump, perhaps one step higher than the last one, BUT, I will just go and see how bad it is. If perhaps we were paying $50 or so for the place, I probably wouldn't be so upset, but having to climb 4 flights of stairs to the room, only made matters worse. Once in there, it looked ok but I wasn't sold. Then Natalie and Noah started to screamed about a roach, so I went to look at what they were talking about. Sure enough, they had opened one of the cabinets and there was this long-ass, at least 3 inch roach dead roach. That was enough for me to say, no thanks, I will sleep in the van. We got our money back and drove away, thankful to have escape that roach motel, so we thought.

to be continued... the ambassadors

(goodnight - need sleep, need sleep, need sleep in a bed!)

Goodbye Golan

(David is doing much better - he had a gastroenteritis viral infection. It usually lasts 3 days and it just needed to run its course.He's still a little weak,but on his feet and ready to tour again. We feel so bad that he miss so much of this beautiful corner of the country.)

We just spent an incredible time with our couchsurfing family, Yaakov and Shoshi Levi, on Moshav קדמת צבי (Quidmat Tzvi). They have a beautiful home full of fruit trees, herbs and flowering trees, as well as a huge guest house they built with a bathroom and kitchen. We stayed in the guesthouse. Yaakov is a farmer and a teacher. He has owns dairy cows and orchard. Shoshi is a social worker and also still living at home is their very sweet son, Sa'ar, who has been terrific with the children. Noah just adores him. On Saturday, Yaakov took the kids and I, as well as his kids to tour the Golan Heights via dirt roads (one of them being the Petroleum Road) and then headed over to Nachal Snir. It's very cool because you can hike in the water or the trail and as you continue through, Nachal Dan joins in, just parallel for a bit and then it merges together. The Dan is much colder than the Snir which was very refreshing. It was so lush and Natalie with an eye just like her dad, was able to spot a huge crab sitting on a rock, totally camouflaged. How she (or David) is able to spot these things is beyond me. On our way home we stopped by a new memorial that honored the 73 young soldiers who died in a horrific helicopter accident in 1997. Two Israeli helicopters were going on a stealth mission and had their lights off and collided. One of the men who died was a former student of Yaakov's.

On Sunday, it was Natalie's 9th Birthday so it was her day to choose what she wanted to do. We headed over to Manara Cliff and rode the cable car, got to ride a very fun alpine ride - sorta like a roller coaster that we can control ourselves, our ticket also included swimming in their Moshav's lovely pool. Afterwards, we grab a bite to eat, met several families who either lived in Israel or were visiting, and then we headed to Kfar Blum for rafting (or they call it kayaking) down the Jordan River. That was a lot of fun. We took Sa'ar along with us and he also had a blast. Driving around wasn't bad at all. I have a great memory and navigation skills, so having already been in the area a few times before over the wknd, it was a breeze. David was very sick that morning so Yaakov took him to the local clinic and they ran some tests, gave him an IV and then diagnose him with the virus he has. Thankfully the doctor was American, so it was much easier to communicate.

By the time we got home, David was feeling much better. His fever had finally broke and though his stomach was still upset, he was ready to continue on to our next big and exciting adventure, to visit good friends of Yaakov, a Druzim Family, located very close to the Syrian border. The Druze are very loyal to Israel, but also can travel back and forth to Syria, where many of their family are based. Unlike the Druzim who live in the Galilee /Carmel Mountain area, the Golani Druzim do not go into the Israeli Army. When we got to their house, we were greeted by the whole family. They live in a very modern home and only one room had furniture per se. Most of the rooms have an area carpet and cushions on the floor. That's where we all sat to eat and to talk. In one of the other rooms, there was a TV on a stand, and the men in there were very much engaged in a hot game of sheshbesh (backgammon.) David was invited to play and he won the game to their surprise. They wanted to play me too, but poor them, we had to leave. : ) I've learned to play Middle Eastern sheshbesh from my girlfriend's father who is Iranian. David also learned from him as well, so perhaps that's why he did so well last night. It was very nice of them to have us visit with them. They brought out a huge circular tray with olives, different types of cheeses from Yaakov's farm, olive oil and Syrian Za'arta (spices), sauteed vegetable which were out of this world - it was soooo good, and a few other dishes that were also very good - all vegetarian, because they know Yaakov and Shoshi do not eat any meat. They also had Druzim pita - this huge round, thin bread, almost the size of Noah, which is all folded up and given to everyone. This was accompanied by some honey, mint tea which also was very good. Afterwards,they brought out another round tray full of different nuts and fruit.

Again, we were so thankful to Yaakov and Shoshi for making our trip so special. Not many people get the opportunity that we just had experience. It was a perfect ending to Natalie's birthday. I hope she forever remembers it.

Today, we are heading to the Northern Coast to visit the Grottoes on the border of Lebanon, and then driving to Haifa and also visiting some small museums in the area. Tonight we will be staying with another couchsurfing family and tomorrow we will be driving down towards Tel Aviv for more exciting touring, including Caesaria, Netanya and Rechovot to visit a clandestine bullet factory during the British Mandate.

Time to get on the road.

Shalom,

Poor David

Well if it wasn't enough that David sprained his knee, he now has come down with hopefully nothing more serious than a virus. Friday morning we took a trip to Katzrin and then to Safed, by the time we headed home, David was about to pass out. In the morning he felt dizzy and nauseous, but we thought it was just the heat but we were wrong, for when we were in Safed, the dizziness came back again - his head began to really hurt and as well as the rest of his body. He went to sleep and when I checked on him, he had a fever and chills. When he told me that he needed not one but two quilts and socks, we knew he was really sick (the weather has been just beautiful and warm.) After alternating between tylenol and ibuprofen, his fever finally broke, but began again soon after it wore off. Around 1am, it kept spiking no matter what I gave him, including a cold towel. It was now 103.2 and rising. So I woke up our guests and headed for the hospital in Safed, only to be told his lungs were find, his vitals were fine, it's probably just a virus. Well, this morning they cycle begins again. I hope he feels better soon and it's not anything more serious.

My poor baby.

The Beautiful North

Hmm, how can I change our plane tickets so we can stay just a little bit longer, say a few more months?

We are in the North right now, and it's been so wonderful. We were guests at one of the most thriving and quite successful kibbutzim in the Israel - Kibbutz Geva in the Jezreel Valley, near Beit She'an and Gan Ha'shlosha (the Sahne) National Park. The children had so much fun horseback riding, watching the cows being milked, meeting a newly born calf and petting not only the other calfs but getting up close and personal to their very small herd of buffalo. They got to visit the sheep and finally get to play with the cats that live among the horses. We got to go swimming in the natural pools of the Sahne, explore the ruins of Beit She'an, and take a scenic drive up Mt. Gilboa. Back at the kibbutz, we ate in the communal dining hall for breakfast and lunch (something rare these days on kibbutzim, I hear) and we were totally spoiled by their most delicious dairy products made on the kibbutz but is unfortunately, not sold to the public (per an agreement with the Dairy association and Tnuva Dairy.)

Up until a week ago, I had foregone eating all dairy and wheat but gave in to the temptation when I was in the Jewish Quarter of the old city in Jerusalem. Though the old arab man with his stone oven hidden away off the alley, has been replaced by new ovens and a staff of workers AND is now a thriving old city business, this tucked away treasure still beckons the passerbyer with it's tempting smells of hot fresh pita and bagela and za'arta spices. So how could I resist?

When visiting Kibbutz Geva, I decided that I just can't be in Israel and NOT eat dairy, especially the yogurts and cheeses, and the fresh pita and pastries. Who knows when I will be able to have this chance again, so I reason. Let me tell you, I was in Heaven. We had the best hummus, I ever tasted in my life, the goat cheese and yogurt was out of this world, and the vegetables - wow. The cucumbers here are different than at home and you can eat them whole. What a meal our host threw together for us - so very simple, yet, delicious.

When we said goodbye this morning for our next adventure in the Golan Heights, we headed for Kfar Tabor and the children had a blast learning the story behind the origins of Marzepan, creating their own chocolate candy and using their imaginations to create their own marzepan edible artwork. From there we were headed to the Kinneret (Sea of Galilee) where were planning to go hiking at Nachal Daliyot, but got sidetracked with a visit at Kibbutz Degania Aleph, Israel's oldest kibbutz. Though the kibbutz is no longer it's former socialist self, it's still quite impressive, beautiful and an educational experience for the kids. Again, the weather was gorgeous and the landscape and views just stunning, especailly as we headed into the Golan towards a moshav just North of Katzrin. Boy did we not expect this little gem. The moshav is like paradise and our hosts and their children (who made a special trip to come home to meet us ... one daughter is a student at Hebrew University and the other is a Madricha for the Israeli Scouts pre-army - not sure the name of the program) are one of the nicest families that we have met. The children love this place and this family.

It's late and I need to get up early for our very busy day exploring. I can't wait to share all of our pictures and videos.

Lilah tov.

-J

Shalom Habibi

We are here in Israel (Jerusalem actually) and having a great time. The weather has been gorgeous and it's been wonderful to just walk around and explore. The city has changed so much, as well as Israel in general. It's been 20 years this summer since I was here last. So hard to believe - when you leave some place that you knew so well and never return nor had any real contact afterwards, all your memories are suspended in time. It's been a little difficult to observe how things have changed as well as getting reoriented. Streets and neighborhoods have literally changed and when you stop to ask someone, especially if they are young, they have no clue or very little memory of how it was or where something may have been. I have no problem adapting to the changes, but I need my memories to help guide me and re-orient myself to my surroundings. I am very good at navigating and so it has been throwing me off by not recognizing the landmarks I bookmarked in my memory.

But it's not stopping us from just allowing us to "get lost" and to explore the old and new Jerusalem (old = 1980's). I've also discovered old neighborhoods that I never knew existed, who architecture is just so charming and beautiful despite the neighborhood's appearance. The kids are loving it here, though all the walking has taken some adjustment on their part, but ever since we knew we were coming, we've been trying to prepare them for all the walking and hiking they would be doing here. Noah is picking up the language very quickly and wants to impress anyone he meets with his new vocabulary. And Natalie has been so adorable, stepping in as our translator. Anytime we encountered only Hebrew, she will ask us if we want her to translate. The kids have also learned the word Feral, as in Feral Cats. Both of them, but especially Natalie just can't seem to get enough of all the cats. It doesn't matter if they are wild or not, they think each cat or kitten they see is adorable, and if they could have their way,they would be stopping to pet every each one of them, which unfortunately, are far too many.

The kids also have gotten to meet family members they never knew before and to re-establish relationships with those they only had minimal contact. When we arrived in Israel, we stayed in Modiin with our cousins. Their little girl and Noah instantly hit it off. Our aunt and uncle also live there (they made Aliyah in December to be closer to both of the children and families.) Natalie was so thrilled to be able to spend time with her Aunt. We also went to visit David's other cousins and Aunt who are on his mother's side of the family and live on Givat Brenner, one the oldest and largest kibbutzes in Israel. Both kids loved the Kibbutz and their cousins (who are probably in the 60's & 70's). Unfortunately their great, great Aunt, who is almost 97 years old, was not very alert when we saw her. But we are so happy that all of us got to finally meet her, even if she didn't consciously seem to be aware we were there. She made aliyah to Israel in 1932 and her son and his wife also live on the kibbutz. They have this great history museum, in which their cousin is the groundskeeper for it, so we were able to take a peek inside. It was wonderful to walk through all that history. I was especially curious about the children's house. All of David's cousins who were raised on the Kibbutz grew up that way, including the most recent generations. They said, they stopped the children's house about 25 years. Though landwise, this kibbutz is one of the largest still remaining in Israel, it's not doing very well. Almost all its industries are gone and the land around the kibbutz is very developed, so it doesn't have a rural feel to it. But they are resourceful and the day we were there, they were celebrating their 80th anniversary. We can't wait to return.

Today we were suppose to head to Masada/Dead Sea/Ein Gedi, but what is a vacation, without David hurting himself. Yep, somehow (hmm, perhaps playing soccer up until our trip - though hubby is in denial) he sprained his knee. It started to flare up a week or so before we left, but with all the walking and with ALL the stairs (and believe me there are a lot of them) it really has become inflamed and very painful for him, He's been a trooper though and hasn't allow the pain to interfere with our sightseeing. He went to the emergency room yesterday to find out how serious it was, and the doctor told him to take Motrin and to stay off t for the next week. So Masada is out and instead we are driving up North to the Jezreel & Bet Shean Valleys to explore Roman and other ancient ruins. We will hopefully also get to take the kids to a biblical village in which the kids can pretend to live the way they did back then, including riding donkeys, making olive oil and pita, and other fun activities. I truly hope the weather stays cooperative and the area's reputation of being scorchingly hot and humid is not actualized. We have truly been so spoiled with this beautiful weather and cool nights here in the Judean desert (and even visiting the Kibbutz which is along the coast, quite near to Tel Aviv, the weather was perfect.)

I will be posting pictures & videos soon but for now, it's time to get the kiddies out of bed, pack up our mini-van (which btw, is so awesome that we found a family to swap cars with) and get on the road.

Yalla, lehitraot.